Category: Fantasy Baseball General

Crime & Punishment

The kid who ran onto the field during the All-Star game may get a year in jail for his actions. I didn’t read the article as to why. I would guess something about how he publicized it on Twitter and the fact it was a nationally televised game. Probably not. I was too obsessed with how ridiculous the picture used was.

All-Star Game 2013 - Met fan runs on field


It literally looks like both the tackler and the tackleree are asleep in this photo. I worry about the tackler’s left ankle too. It appears to not be in proper alignment with the ground. I worry for his metatarsals. If you only look at the upper half of the photo it’s quite romantic.

Oh and the fantasy baseball week started up again yesterday. I also got a job. The last time I started working during this fantasy baseball season I went on a 5 game losing streak. Here’s to hoping I won’t go winless the rest of the season.

Backfiring Strategies and Busted by the Commisioner

As we approached the All-Star break and I had little commitment to some of my starting pitchers, I decided it was a good move to select as many pitchers as I could who qualify as starting pitchers and relief pitchers. I could only really select two, Brett Cecil and Josh Collmenter. Well, more were available, but their 4.87 ERAs scared me off. I had enough starts this week and figured this could give me an extra boost over Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages this week. Everything seemed fine until a message was sent out by the Commissioner this week saying it is an illegal strategy that gives an unfair advantage. Advantage, yes. Unfair, they’re all just jealous I thought of it first!

I agreed to follow the laws set out by the league. I dropped Cecil and Collmenter because they are now useless to me. The worst thing about this is Brett Cecil cost me -4 points yesterday with a blown save in the 8th inning. If this had happened a day earlier, I would have at least 4 points back. So really my great strategy ended up backfiring on me.

I have a bunch of other strange strategies I would love to test out in fantasy baseball leagues. One I call “Ransom Drafting.” This strategy is where you use all of your draft picks to select one position until all of the good ones are taken. Realistically I don’t think this would really work. In my head though, people will be upset that I have Joe Mauer, Buster Posey, Yadier Molina, etc. and then offer me their best position players for them. Like I said, I don’t see this fully working as much as it would probably just get everyone really angry. Still, it could be something to do if you ever want to burn some bridges.


Fake 2013 All-Star Teams

The RT Baseball League (the name of the league the Miami Carlins are participating in) have announced their All-Star teams today. The two leagues is split in two divisions, East and West, and will be playing each other never. The teams were decided on fantasy points alone and no other factors such as popularity, ballot box stuffing, or relationship with the media. I have taken the players with the most points at their positions and put them on this team. These are the squadrons.

I have selected two players from every position (6 outfielders) along with 7 starting pitchers and 4 relief pitchers.



C – Buster Posey (Stone Cold)

C – Joe Mauer (Si Hurricanes)

1B – Paul Goldschmidt (Team Gold)

1B – Joey Votto (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

2B – Dustin Pedroia (Team Gold)

2B – Brandon Phillips (Si Hurricanes)

3B – Josh Donaldson (Team Gold)

3B – Evan Longoria (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

SS – Ian Desmond (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

SS – Everth Cabrera (Stone Cold)

OF – Mike Trout (Team Gold)

OF – Carlos Gonzalez (Si Hurricanes)

OF – Jacoby Ellsbury (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

OF – Domonic Brown (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

OF – Adam Jones (Cecil Cantrell)

SP – Max Scherzer (Stone Cold)

SP – Matt Harvey (Cecil Cantrell)

SP – Clayton Kershaw (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

SP – Adam Wainwright (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

SP – Felix Hernandez (Stone Cold)

SP – Madison Bumgarner (Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages)

SP – Hisashi Iwakuma (Team Gold)

RP – Greg Holland (Stone Cold)

RP – Aroldis Chapman (Si Hurricanes)

RP – Edward Mujica (Team Gold)

RP – Craig Kimbrel (Cecil Cantrell)



C – Yadier Molina (Houston Asterisks)

C – Carlos Santana (Miami Carlins)

1B – Chris Davis (Team Boyle)

1B – Edwin Encarnacian (The Fuzzy Taints)

2B – Robinson Cano (Houston Asterisks)

2B – Jason Kipnis (Drunkin’ Drafters)

3B – Miguel Cabrera (The Fuzzy Taints)

3B – David Wright (Drunkin’ Drafters)

SS – Jean Seguar (The Fuzzy Taints)

SS – Troy Tulowitzki (Houston Asterisks)

OF – Jose Bautista (Drunkin’ Drafters)

OF – Andrew McCutchen (Miami Carlins)

OF – Carlos Gomez (Miami Carlins)

OF – Matt Carpenter (Miami Carlins)

OF – Allen Craig (Miami Carlins)

OF – Michael Cuddyer (Houston Asterisks)

SP – Cliff Lee (Team Boyle)

SP – Jordan Zimmermann (Miami Carlins)

SP – Yu Darvish (Miami Carlins)

SP – Patrick Corbin (The Fuzzy Taints)

SP – Homer Bailey (Houston Asterisks)

SP – Mike Minor (Miami Carlins)

RP – Jason Grilli (Drunkin’ Drafters)

RP – Joe Nathan (Miami Carlins)

RP – Addison Reed (Team Boyle)

RP – Mariano Rivera (The Fuzzy Taints)

Smash+Mouth+-+All+Star+-+5-+CD+SINGLE-139893(Say what you want, Smashmouth is a genius band. Forever and always will this song play whenever an All-Star team is selected)

A Week of Great Matchups

The Miami Carlins have great pitching matchups this week. Dare I call it epic?

Last night began with Jordan Zimmermann pitching against the Milwaukee Brewers and Matt Moore against the Houston Astros. Later in the week, Zimmermann pitches against the San Diego Padres and Matt Moore pitches against the Chicago White Sox.

mlb_g_moore-zimmerman_576(Magically I didn’t even have to create this picture)

But wait, there’s more!

Yu Darvish’s lone start this week is against his lone star counterparts, the Houston Astros. John Lackey pitches against the San Diego Padres and the underachieving Los Angeles Angels. Mike Minor pitches against the Miami Marlins, Jake Westbrook pitches against the Miami Marlins, and then the next start Mike Minor makes on Monday is again against the Miami Marlins. The only bad matchup this week is Cole Hamels against the Pittsburgh Pirates, a team that although they are the best team in the league, it’s their pitching that really is the reason why.

With all of these great starts, how do I decide who to pitch? Let’s start with Jordan Zimmermann, the team captain. I refuse to not start him no matter who the opponent is. He’s getting both of his starts. That takes up 2/7 starts.

Yu Darvish nearly pitched a perfect game against the Astros so that’s 3/7.

Mike Minor and Jake Westbrook against the Marlins, that’s a no brainer. We’re now at 5/7.

Cole Hamels has struggled this season so I’m definitely not using his start. And although John Lackey has been pitching well, his matchups are still not as favorable as the others. The Padres are no cake walk and the Angels are way overdue.

The final two starts will most likely be used again with Matt Moore’s start against the White Sox, as well as the one used last night. And that’s how I got to 7/7 starts used.

It means very little at this point, but the Miami Marlins lead the Si Hurricanes 43-6. There was an unusually high number of strikeouts for both teams. Thankfully, Matt Moore’s 30 points helped get us a huge jump-start.

The only hard decision right now seems to be how to get Matt Carpenter into the starting lineup. Tonight Carlos Gomez is not playing so Carpenter has been moved to the Utility position. For now though it could be tricky and Pablo Sandoval could be riding the pine a little more than he would like. Then again, he’s so incredible fat and would enjoy getting to sit. I’ve really had it out for him this season.

Due for an Update

This week feels familiar. Not only am I back to being jobless and describing myself as a “starving artist” as I sit around in my underwear watching YouTube videos all day (I’m kidding, I’m very productive…) but the Miami Carlins are also performing well and without much worry.

The Miami Carlins have a nice 185-157 lead over Drunkin’ Drafters. We’re tied up in starts with 3 and will remain tied after today with 5. For the Carlins, Matt Moore and newly acquired Jake Westbrook will look to add to the team’s point scoring deluge. For Drunkin’ Drafters, C.J. Wilson and Kyle Lohse will be pitching. Moore has had some bad starts lately, many of which he hasn’t been in the starting lineup for the Carlins during. I’m hoping he’ll bounce back from his last start and put in a good performance now that he knows I’m relying on him.

Not much other news has happened in the league or for the Carlins specifically. It’s almost as if many of the teams in this league are counting on free agent signings to help them win this season. Currently in the Carlins starting lineup Matt Carpenter, Jhonny Peralta, and a combination Torii Hunter/Carlos Gomez/Daniel Nava are all free agent signings. The only player I dropped this season I wish I had not dropped is Domonic Brown, who I guess only had one good month and has since cooled off. I have him in my Yahoo league so not all is lost from releasing him.

Matt Carpenter, Carlos Gomez, and Daniel Nava are 3 of the top scoring players on the Carlins and in the league. I never thought so much of the team would be created in free agency. Pitchers are of course different as those are changing much more frequently such as signing whoever is pitching against the Astros or Marlins. You may at this point be able to add the Chicago White Sox to that list, a team that seems to rely on Adam Dunn home runs to get by. Surprise teams near the bottom of runs scored are the Washington Nationals and Los Angeles Dodgers. The Houston Astros are actually 21st in runs scored this season. Why are they so bad? It’s their pitching, the worst in the majors. When the Astros win, they win 10-8. When the Astros lose, they lose 8-1. You should still feel confident enough starting a pitcher against them though. Younger guys may be a little riskier, especially rookies considering many of the guys on the Astros probably faced them in the minors.

astros pitcher(Houston Astros pitcher Jacob Clarke pitching last week on his 11th birthday. He got a blown save and a new bike!)

This post was ridiculous and gave no real insight into how to help your own fantasy baseball team. I’m really getting the hang of this expert thing.

Points For and Points Against

One feature the league provides us with is how many Points each team has scored throughout the season and how many Points have been scored on us. This information actually provides a lot of insight into team strength. The more points you score, the more wins you should have. However, sometimes teams like the Miami Carlins get a lot of points scored on them which means they have to score eve more points to win. I’ve decided to add some Weekly Power Rankings to determine which team is the most powerful, mostly because the Carlins are the most. Here is how it currently stands.

Points For:

3042 – Miami Carlins

2982 – Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages

2884 – Team Gold

2857 – The Fuzzy Taints

2805 – Stone Cold

2769 – Cecil Cantrell

2725 – Team Boyle

2710 – Drunkin’ Drafter

2543 – Si Hurricanes

2288 – Houston Asterisks

Points Against:

2874 – The Fuzzy Taints

2871 – Houston Asterisks

2798 – Miami Carlins

2792 – Cecil Cantrell

2774 – Stone Cold

2772 – Drunkin’ Drafter

2745 – Team Boyle

2710 – Si Hurricanes

2655 – Team Gold

2614 – Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages

As you can see, there are some teams who score a lot of points and are scored upon quite a bit more than other teams. The Points Against are also in a much closer range than the Points Scored which makes sense because we have all played each other near evenly. So here’s how the rankings will work. For each place you rank, you will get that score. First place gets 1, second place 2, etc. The teams with the lowest scores will be ranked higher. It’s like golf. Tie-breaker will go to actual team record followed by whoever scored more points. The science of this is that the fewer points you have scored on you then the more wins you should have. Make sense? It doesn’t matter. I’m just trying to delay having to go to the grocery store.

Power Rankings:

1 – Miami Carlins (final score 4)

2 – The Fuzzy Taints (final score 5)

3 – Stone Cold (final score 10)

4 – Cecil Cantrell (final score 10)

5 – Jimmy Dean Vienna Sausages (final score 12)

6 – Team Gold (final score 12)

7 – Houston Asterisks (final score 12)

8 – Team Boyle (final score 14)

9  – Drunkin’ Drafter (final score 14)

10 – Si Hurricanes (final score 17)

And of course in the end this is nothing more than another baseball math problem that means nothing to who will win. This is just a way for me to be reminded that I have terrible luck.

7 Wins Each

I was looking at the league leaders to see if I came across anything to brag about when I found this.

7 wins


Jordan Zimmermann, Matt Moore, and Yu Darvish all lead the league in wins with 7. All three are on the Miami Carlins. Coincidence or great draft picks by me?